Originally Posted Tuesday, November 12, 2013
I’m usually intrigued and impressed by Jr’s ability to work through his anxiety, impulses and imagination.
There’s often times where I’m frustrated because Jr is “in his head” & not in the present. I’ve learned that his imagination overlaps his perception and processing of reality.
For example, he will hear me say I need to talk to you Jr, but you’ve got to be ready to receive Mommy seriously. Yet he’ll sit there seemingly attentive, until……
An “impulsive” thought crosses his mind, then his smile begins to manifest itself. Now when this happens, I haven’t lost him completely but he’s drifting.
I’ve had to accept this to “an extent” is self soothing/disengaging behavior that assists him in processing the world he lives in.
I also allow him time and space to “be autistically free.” Meaning he’s allowed to talk about his superheros; we even let him put on the costume for short periods of time; he plays superhero squad abs various games both educational and recreational online frequently; he also draws pictures and uses his blocks to build objects that coincide with his imagination or redundant recollection of things, movies, etc he fixates on.
Now, lately I’ve begun to teach Jr how and where to “try” to control at least the impulse (urge) to make superhero sounds, talk about superheros, etc. so that as he gets older he’ll be able to focus and be attentive throughout his educational and professional life/endeavors.
When all else fails… Jr is given downtime; where I determine what he’ll watch; he gets an additional bath to calm his nerves; I’ll have him write about what he’s thinking about; utilize his anxiety by having him complete chores to tire him out while simultaneously teaching him the art of earning (work ethic) and giving him the activity’s of daily living he’ll need to be successfully independent in the future; the last resort is no electronic stimulation and lights out.
I urge those of us whose loved ones on the spectrum that are verbal, to attempt to alter some of their behaviors but not blatantly discouraging it, but encouraging alternative methods of expression as the aforementioned.
For those of us whose loved ones are non verbal, I pray that with the assistance of visual supports and sign language you’re able to connect with them, as well as teach them to communicate with us.
We must do our best to assist and accommodate them also.