Originally Posted Monday, December 16, 2013
Since Jr was diagnosed with #Autism in “2010” I’ve really increased my teachings of realism through experiential learning.
I don’t want Jr growing up with “a distorted perception of reality or a false sense of entitlement.”
I allow Jr to make decisions to test his “knowledge and reactions” in every situation, so that going forward I’ll be able to assist him in processing matters.
Jr is taught “work ethic” now because to teach him merely about “receiving incentives and rewards” will breed a false sense of entitlement, they may never be able to be reformed.
I leave toys at home often so that Jr can “learn” to process through his anxiety or suppress it (within reason). Jr actually never had a tantrum publicly,although his grunts and expressions spoke for his discontent or impatience.
Jr now can verbally express to me “Mommy are we almost finished? Mommy I want to go home.”
Jr also now can express “Mommy I’m upset about…..” Where at one time, he’d stomp off, slam his room door and either cry from feeling powerless I assume, destroy something or write on the wall to vent.
Once I explained to Jr that spanking him wasn’t my thing because that can get out of control. I have Bipolar Disorders; so I have to find “alternative” discipline methods that don’t trigger or breed my mania.
I became a new improved version of my mother.
I began to teach him “what life really is about.” I made him learn that “despite your Autism” many people won’t feel sorry for you; you honestly don’t want them to. Others will try to hinder you because of your abilities. They’ll be few who’ll honestly love, support and protect you. Your father and I, after God will be your ultimate examples and givers of love, support and protection.
Jr understands in “his own way” what him having Autism and I having Bipolar Disorders means. He understands we are different. He understands it’s best for us to learn how to care for ourselves because nobody will always be around to care for us. He understands things that are easy for us, may be hard for others; just as things which are hard for us, may be easy for others.
He understands doing your best is all you need to do. He understands that his father and I love and know that we are blessed with every accomplishment he makes!!
I’m ecstatic to share that yesterday Sunday, December 15, 2013 Jr cleaned his own bowel movement, entirely by himself. He was so proud of himself. So was I! This doesn’t mean I can check this off my “things I’d love for Jr to do but am willing to accept what he may not be able to” list; but we’re much closer than we’ve ever been.
I just offer to some of you “consider” being honest with your child. If we want them to be honest adults, we must teach them how to be honest children.
We can’t protect them from the world; we can only prepare them for it!
“Autism isn’t a disability, it’s the ability to see and experience the world differently!”