Originally Posted Thursday, November 14, 2013
Above, please focus your attention on the picture I created. This picture “represents” what I go through “Everyday” simply to “be the master of my mania!”
The three pictures on the top show how the manic thoughts process. The first picture on the far left and in the middle, represent what happens once I’m “awake/manic.” My mind like a computer starts loading all the startup programs and then some.
The last picture shows how I begin to force my mind to start “cleaning up.”
Once I’ve decided “not to allow my manic thoughts to hinder or hurt myself or anyone else, even if it’s temporary” a “lightbulb” ALWAYS comes on.
*Mind you I’ve been “mastering my mania” long before I was ever diagnosed with Bipolar Disorders or PTSD. I want everyone to understand that “many” of us may “need” professional help alongside prescribed medication.*
THE BOTTOM PICTURES: As the lightbulb is coming on, several things happen physically, spiritually/emotionally and mentally. First off, I get extremely sweaty and anxious; because it’s extremely difficult to suppress mania. It’s even more difficult to suppress my “grand desires, feelings of anger, etc.” Once I realize that I’m “racing” I do my best to “control myself.”
Controlling myself consists of accepting that “I’m on to something great, so let’s use it, before we lose it; or today may not be my day!” Meaning that I may need to rest. No work, no play; just rest. Other times it means that “I must push” like today for example, through my mania and it’s impulses to accomplish a goal that will lead to the completion and manifestation of several other things I aspire to accomplish.
Here’s what I offer to you:
1. Use a “to do list” everyday! Write down the things that you “have to do” everyday. For example, getting the child/ren off to school; washing dishes, etc. You should have at least 3 things that you’ll do “everyday” to maintain your mental health; no matter the circumstances/situation.
2. Learn your “triggers.” Knowing your triggers is extremely important, because to know those is to “know your mania!”
IF YOU DON’T LEARN YOUR TRIGGERS, YOUR RESPONSES TO THEM CAN CONSUME, IF NOT COMPLETELY DESTROY YOU~ PLEASE LEARN YOUR TRIGGERS
3.Take notes of your “manic” episodes. Manic episodes usually cause to you to make impulsive decisions, especially in the area of finances/investments; sexually you can and will become promiscuous (if not extremely careful with and aware of yourself); arrogance and presumption can consume you.
4. Create and use effective coping and prevention skills. For example, when my sister in law irritates me to the extent I “think” of physically harming her or verbally attacking her; I avoid her. I I also “write” about my experiences, frustrations, etc.. I go in OCD mode; I clean up. I watch comedy shows to “avert” the manic thoughts and to calm my spirit. To prevent mania at times, I’ll simply decide not to have a bad day “no matter what!” This works as longs as I’m aware of my triggers, I’ve made note of the episode (even if it all played out in my head) and I use the coping skills I’ve been taught and that I created specifically for myself/situation.
5. Don’t be afraid to seek out the help of a medical professional, specifically a psychotherapist, and psychiatrist. We “all” need someone that we can confide in, but we also need someone who can monitor us. Even I have had to accept defeat, because I’d ended my last “Detrimental” manic episodes last year. It was terrible, but it also gave me the hit I needed to get back up stronger than ever!
FYI: I don’t take the prescribed medication because of it’s side effects and my inability to “use my mania” for the greater good when needed. I haven’t had a talk therapy session with my psychotherapist in months. I’ve left several voicemails, with only one response and no follow-up. I’ve requested to have my medication changed after some recent research and I’ve not even received a response from my psychiatrist. I share this with you, because “Even the professionals WILL let you down!” Many of the mental health professionals that assist us are “receiving assistance themselves through therapy and medication.” So again, understand having them may be essential to your mental health, but it’s not ALL that you’ll need.
6. Be honest, consistent and accountable with, for, and in all things that you do. The worst thing you can do is lie, or become inconsistent and expect others to be consistent. Then you have to be accountable for “all” that you do. Don’t avoid the bad incidents, because they won’t go away. Those negative impulses don’t go away, EVER! The thoughts will always be there, but the “actions can be suppressed if not cease to exist.” Embrace the good and use that as a guideline on how to act and react going forward.
7. Be who you are. Stop worrying about being accepted or understood. Many people with Bipolar spend “ample” time “Worrying” about the wrong things, people and places. We end up sinking deep into the depths of depression; while others are moving on with their lives. STOP THE PITY PARTY NOW!
Start the production line! Get your mind right! You are in control of yourself! Nothing and nobody else!
You know what you want, go and get it! You know what you need, establish and maintain it! You know who and what isn’t good for you; no matter how you “feel” about it; get rid of anyone and anything that’s unhealthy for you!
Repeat this daily: I AM THE MASTER OF MY MANIA!